Well, I cant sleep. I slept in for the first time in a long time today. I am wondering about the future. Where will we go in August? What will we be doing? During the last couple of years while friends have been loosing their jobs and struggling to find new ones, I have felt so blessed that I have had a high level of job security.
Not too long ago I found out that the plans that I had been resting so securely in for the last couple of years were gone. It was easy to extol the goodness of the Lord when my friends and acquaintances were facing uncertainty because I thought I knew what I was going to be doing for the next few years. Now that is gone.
In the days that followed the phone call telling me that things were changing I began to panic just a little. Subsequently I have spent the last few weeks wrestling with understanding how much effort I should be putting into determining where my wife and I would go from here when my contract is up. I have called some conferences and emailed others at the unions trying to network and find a place for Lauren and I to go.
Finally I came to the conclusion that I was wasting my time. It is not that I was not making good contacts. From a professional stand point I am rather marketable. If I called enough people and worked enough angles I am confident that I would find somewhere for us to go. But anyone with a little know how can network and find a job.
Jesus said in Matthew 6:25 that we should not be anxious about life. I encourage you to read that section of the Sermon on the Mount it is quite comforting regardless of your current situation.
There are unfortunately still a number of character traits that remain form my life before Christ. But I have decided that worrying about the future is not going to be one of them anymore. I have praised God while everything was going good and now I am going to rest in Him while I pass through this short season of uncertainty.
As I am sitting here awake tonight thinking about the future I am not worrying about whats going to happen. No, tonight I am filled with peace and expectation I do not know where we will go from here, but I know this, where ever God takes us will be far more exciting then any place I could find to be.